Aren’t we all feeling this way

April 24, 2020

I had thought I would post daily. I guess not. Makes sense, even if its vaguely disappointing. The only thing I do every day is eat some oreo cookies, drink 2 cups of coffee and sleep like crap. Posting here seems to have been relegated into the realm of exercise, meaning something I do regularly, more or less, but aspire to do more. The pandemic has not made made me better at either of these things, posting or working out. I am exactly who I was before the pandemic, as far as getting shit done.

MTB was wearing a sweatshirt today commando style, i.e. no bra. A very early lesbian look. Reminded me of a lot of dykes who were around when I came out. Always braless. Flashing back to those times, for a second, I thought I had insight about my generation of dykes who came out in the early 80’s, and how maybe how we bridged the gap between 70’s lesbians and 90’s dykes, and how that was cool. But then I also remembered how many dykes of my generation turned out to be hateful TERFS, and I didn’t care so much pursuing that insight.

I have had an on and off again, low grade headache since self isolation orders went into effect. And a stuffy nose. And sometimes a sore throat. Hasn’t gotten worse. Hasn’t gotten better. Fucking allergies and I can’t seem to remember to take claritin at regular intervals. There is at least one moment every day where I think, this headache is different or this sore throat is itchy. Do I have COVID-19? Is this how it starts? Is everyone having a similar experience? Aren’t we all at least vaguely scared of getting sick or of someone we know and love getting sick?

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