it wasn’t a dream

July 28, 2008

Last night here in the homeland. I feel strangely cut loose and solid all at the same time. I have thought of home so much this year.  Seen certain landscapes in my mind and felt such longing for the place that I thought I might be romanticizing it all.  Thought I might be wanting this sense of home to live in me more than it does.  But here I am and the home in me is beating and breathing even as I type. And that is a beautiful feeling, man.

I am not any closer to knowing what next or where next or how next or anything about nextness.  But I wasn’t coming home to answer that question.  How Indiana fits into whatever’s next has been to some degree resolved in undestanding the Indiana in me. 

It has been impossible to be here and not think about this girl in western Mass. Knowing her has helped me know myself, and at times that kinda knowing has blown me away. 


3 responses to “it wasn’t a dream”

  1. pep says:

    i dream of threading people and places together to come up with the perfect locale.

  2. love notes says:

    i enjoyed the time we spent together. you are so easy for me to be with – free is the word that comes to mind. and i gained some wisdom and perspective in 2 places that were heavy for me.

    come back any time and hang out. neko and obi have given their thumbs up.

  3. proteanme says:

    i’m down with the dream, pep. sooo down. and spending time with you, love notes, was a hi-light for sure. a thousand thank yous for your company and your generosity. and i feel the same about obi and neko. even if neko was a bed hog.

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