proteanme

Seriously, it is the Ides out here. We had 77% more rain than normal in May and that was after a record breaking 25 days of rain in April and I just read that the mother fucking rain is supposed to continue through the end of this week. Fuck this. Seriously. I was trying to be all Zen about it this morning, about how this is good practice and about how I’m creating my own suffering, but I don’t want to practice with this nuclear spring cloud cover and the constant precipitation. Jesus. Right now I can see a small stretch of blue sky and it makes me want to jump in my car, race to the airport and buy a ticket to take me to any where that’s sunny and hot. I heard a story on the radio a couple days ago about hay farmers and how this rain is wiping out their most lucrative harvest, which is usually around now, and I thought to myself you have to be a seriously Zen mo’ fo’ to farm. Zen with good sense of humor. And I’m not a farmer, you know what I mean? I’m a bitter midwestern expat who misses the fuck out of summertime.

My birthday’s coming up. That’s part of it. I think it’s rained on my birthday here the last three years in a row. I swear, just to spite me. It’s an insult to person born in the beginning of June to celebrate out here in the land of eternal spring, minus the good parts, like thunderstorms. Enough already. I had pool parties growing up. I caught fireflies on my birthday. Everyone wore shorts and sandals or t-shirts and flip flops when I had a party. When we weren’t outside running around we were sitting in front of a fan or inside with the AC on. We had to eat our ice cream before it melted.